November 12, 2010

Starbucks Dilemma

No matter where I go to get my coffee, the same problem surfaces. I usually only throw $5 down the drain at a Starbucks if I need to wake up, or because of the temperature outside. If it's like 130 degrees outdoors, I usually think, "Something cold to drink would be nice." So I park my sweatbox car and go inside. Then. BAM. It's snowing inside and I'm wearing shorts.

It feels nice for a moment. But then I get uncomfortable. I go up to the counter to order my drink like someone who has never been inside a Starbucks before.

Me: "Can I have a medium-size cold coffee thing with lots of caramel in it?"

Barista: "An iced mocha frappuccino..? With caramel?"

She proceeds to write a long, explanatory novel on my cup so the coffee savvy employees can understand me.

I shiver a bit.

Me: "Actually, do you have an equivalent to that drink in a hot version?"

Of course I get a strange look from the girl, who is sweating from a hard day's work.

Barista: "You could get a cafe mocha with caramel. Would you like caramel sauce, or caramel syryp?"

Me: "...Uh, I don't know, whichever makes more caramel in my drink."

Barista: "They are probably the same."

Me: "...Surprise me?"

So I wait, doing a dance to keep warm that makes me look like a 2nd grader praying to pass a bathroom on a field trip to the zoo.

And then I curl up in a warm comfy chair and drink the thing. It is dental health suicide. And it's wonderful. After that delicious drink, I'm warm and toasty and comfy all over.

Soon I remember where it was I was headed, and leave. I open the door.

It's still 130 degrees outside.


  1. I'm happy to not be the only one thinking Starbucks got overpriced coffee but yet can't go get one elsewhere! haha funny stuff

  2. The dangers of too much AC I guess :P Nice illustrations btw!

  3. Haha thanks.. that's as good as they get using a mouse in paint.


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