December 17, 2010

Permanent Approval

WARNING: Don't be stupid enough
to believe that the events in the
following post are good ideas to try.

This is a step-by-step guide to making life a little more "okay." This will be achieved by forcing you to accept everything you encounter.

STEP ONE: Get a cat.
Or an object that can be placed up in a high place. Note: a burnt out light bulb that needs changing is also an acceptable substitute.

STEP TWO: Get a friend.
Or something else equally dangerous to climb.

STEP THREE: Achieve belligerence.
We recommend ingesting alcohol, or just being plain retarded.

STEP FOUR: Try to think of a way to reach the object from Step One while only using the materials provided in Step Two and Step Three.

STEP FIVE: Once you have hurt yourself, delay seeking medical assistance for a while.

STEP SIX: Finally go to a doctor and receive a cast.

My arm hurts for some reason.

STEP SEVEN: Encounter situations in which you must have an opinion on something.

* Side effects may include pain and the inability to perform at your heavily computer-oriented day job.

But it's all good, according to you.


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